Spouses are diplomats. Plan accordingly.

observation — attributed to Esther Coopersmith

During the Camp David negotiations, Coopersmith hosted a gathering where the wives of Anwar Sadat and Menachem Begin met before their husbands did. Egyptian and Israeli press, staff, and children swam in the same pool. Most people did not pay attention to anybody's spouses. Coopersmith did, and she used the access to do meaningful backchannel diplomacy on issues their principals could not yet discuss openly. The Senate Wives program she organized later, sending bipartisan delegations to Thailand, India, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, and Taiwan, produced friendships among Senators that translated into legislation. Spouses are not auxiliary attendees. They are the back channel.

For diplomatic event organizers, political fundraisers, and convening designers operating in environments where the named principal is not the only person with influence. The observation generalizes to any context where formal authority and actual influence are not the same.

spouses, diplomacy, backchannel, soft-power